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Today's Quote--"Happy birthday to me, Happy birthday to me..."
Monday, December 16, 2002
I can't wait to go home. Everything I do is tempered with that need, that thought, in 5 days, I'll be home. In exactly 4 days, I'll be on the ground in my hometown. I can't believe it, I actually got some work done, a lot done, math is all done. Worked on Peace Studies...about half done with my note outlines for the test. Made my Japanese flashcards and studied them for awhile. I feel like I got a lot done. Company, the presence of other people, helps a whole lot. I miss home, but it's so close, I can taste it.
The rain that soaked my clothes was refreshing, the wind pushing me in all directions was cleansing, but snow, cold, the bitter stuff, the kind of thing that bites you when you walk outside, the dirty streets, the gray mumblings of shoppers, the look of everyone bundled up against the elements, the trees with bare limbs, the ice, the danger, the fun, the comfort of snuggling up with a warm blanket and hot chocolate to watch the snow fall, the smell of melting snow and hot bodies in stores, the uncomfortable hotness of being bundled up in a heated room, waiting, too close to the door to take off your gloves, too hot to keep them on, the shock of stepping out underneath those gray skies, the sun a mild yellow ball hanging forlornly amidst dirty clouds, skimming their way somewhere, the annoying Christmas music that is played everywhere you go, the bright Christmas lights dancing in the snow, the bustle of crowds, everyone intent on getting where they're going, not stopping to notice the little girl you once were, the little girl you still are, standing, watching, amazed, frightened, loving it, hating it, tears flowing in any direction because they need to go, the cries of the real children, too hot, too tired to care, the cries of the parents, too poor, too tired to care, the way the people change, casual hellos and good-byes become more meaningful as the realization of our mortality mixes with a new year, the poor jokes that try to cover up our feelings of inadequecy, the closeness of family killing the mood, making the mood, warm, comforting, stifling, too close, too far away, Peace On Earth, Good Will To Men, bomb 'em, people oblivious to the dangers faced by others, others who can't celebrate, who don't celebrate, everyone's the same, so different, "We Are All Individuals", but this individual, wants only, to go home.
GL 10:28 PM
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